Ancient Times

INT. LIVING ROOM – NIGHT

OLIVER is sitting on the sofa, swiping away on his phone.

His girlfriend (AMELIA) enters the room, looking stressed.

AMELIA: Oliver, my phone is broken.

Oliver is absorbed in his phone and not really listening.

OLIVER: Oh no, that’s rough.

AMELIA: And I need to talk to you.

Oliver is surprised, but is still looking at his phone.

OLIVER: Talk? Talk to me?

AMELIA: Yeah, you know, like face to face. Without screens or filters.

OLIVER: (realising) Oh, you mean like back in ancient times?

AMELIA: Yeah, I guess so.

OLIVER: (stunned) Whoa, this is going to get weird.

Amelia sits next to him on the sofa.

AMELIA: Tell me about it.

Oliver scratches his head and looks awkward. He misunderstands Amelia’s comment.

OLIVER: Well, I don’t know where to start...

AMELIA: (sighs) Well, you know, I just need to vent. Work has been so hectic lately, and...

Oliver is looking confused. He holds his phone up in front of Amelia and swipes at the screen.

AMELIA: Oliver, put the phone down, will you?

OLIVER: Sorry, this is just so freaky without emojis. I can’t even customise you with unicorn ears and stars whizzing around your head. I don’t know how cave people used to cope. Okay, anyway, I’ll give it a go... Vent away.

AMELIA: Well, my phone was broken when I dropped it during my slick dance moves on top of the office printer in accounts. Everyone was looking and...

OLIVER: (interrupting) Wait, can’t you just send me a vlog, or a screenshot of your notes, or something?

AMELIA: Oh yeah, sorry babe, the content will drop. I just need your phone to film your response on TikTok.

Oliver springs up, and without music, immediately does an enthusiastic (but ridiculous) TikTok dance. Amelia films it on his phone and taps lots of emojis. Oliver completes his moves and does a hand gesture pose to sign off.