Sorry I’m late. First, my car wouldn’t start. Then, my coffee betrayed me—spilled all over my lap. A bird decided my head would make a great nest. Lost my phone in a puddle. Had to ask for directions from a mime, who was as unhelpful as you’d expect.
Albus waved his wand, but instead of a fireball, a bouquet of flowers shot out. “Oh, come on!”
His opponent, an evil sorcerer named Cedric, paused. “Did you just try to defeat me with… roses?”
Albus sighed. “Look, it’s not me, it’s the wand. I bought it from a wizard named Gary who said it had ‘personality’.”
Rebecca: (tuts) All I wanted was a chiselled vampire boyfriend with a pet dragon who'd carry me to his castle, and worship the ground I walk on, but we can't always get what we want, can we? Well, I suppose there's Thor, Aquaman, and maybe a Minotaur... if he drives the right car. Who am I kidding? I only have eyes for Prince Elrondar from my novel. A man who'd lay down his kingdom for me. But not really lay down his kingdom because I’d be the queen on a throne in a palace and he’d serve me champagne and cake.
Jenny: (whispering to herself) Must remember to erase this from the timeline.
Sarah: Excuse me, did you say “erase this from the timeline”?
Jenny: Uh, no, I said, um, “I want to lease this pantomime.” Yeah, that’s it
Cedric: (holding the roses) Are we still fighting, or is this a poorly executed rom-com now?
Albus: (sighs) Honestly, I can't even tell anymore.
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