Everyone’s an Expert Now

There was a time when wisdom came

From years of toil and thought,

When knowledge was a precious thing

That had to first be taught.

But now the world has moved along,

We’ve found a quicker way,

Just watch a clip, absorb a bit,

And lecture folk all day.

The doctor studied seven years,

The surgeon studied ten,

But Kevin knows a better way—

He watched a bloke called Ben.

He knows the cause of every ill,

From dandruff down to gout,

And if the experts disagree,

He simply shouts them out.

Our Sandra’s now a therapist,

She read a Facebook post,

And diagnoses everyone

While buttering her toast.

“You’re narcissistic, Uncle Jim,

And Dad’s got OCD!”

But mention Sandra’s drinking and

She’ll say, “Don’t lecture me!”

Young Darren’s into finance now,

He trades in crypto schemes,

He calls himself an entrepreneur

With seven income streams.

He’s lost his wages three times round,

His overdraft’s a wreck,

But says he’s nearly wealthy now—

Just waiting for a cheque.

And Doris knows the climate’s fine,

She’s lived for eighty years,

She’s seen some snow in April,

So she laughs at scientists’ fears.

“The planet’s always changing, dear,

It’s nothing new to me!”

Then wonders why her roses bloom

In early February.

We all have grand opinions

On the things we do not know,

We shout them from the rooftops

And refuse to let them go.

We cannot fix a dripping tap,

Or make the printer print,

But give us world affairs to solve,

We’ll offer every hint.

The facts are merely obstacles,

The truth a point of view,

And evidence is optional

When confidence will do.

Why waste your time with learning

When conviction wins the day?

A loud enough opinion

Makes the facts just fade away.

And somewhere sits a quiet soul

Who’s studied all his life,

Who knows that every answer

Brings uncertainty and strife.

He weighs the facts, admits his doubts,

And cautiously says, “Perhaps…”

But no one hears his wisdom

Through the thunderous verbal scraps.

For certainty is fashionable,

And doubt has lost its crown,

The loudest fool’s a genius

If he shouts the others down.

We’ve all become authorities,

With expertise to spare,

We know about the whole wide world

Without once going there.

And if you think I’m talking rot,

Or question what I say,

I’ve read three posts this morning—

So I’m an expert, anyway!