Fred's Dread

INT. LIVING ROOM – DAY

FRED is sitting on a sofa, clutching a pillow tightly. He is wearing a helmet, knee pads, elbow pads, and a life jacket.

FRED: (to himself) Okay, let’s see... The door is locked. Check. The windows are locked. Check. The sofa cushions are arranged safely. Check. The coast is clear. Check. Now I just need to remember to breathe.

His house mate, DEAN, opens the front door with a key.

DEAN: (calling out) I’m back.

He walks into the living room and is bewildered by the sight of Fred.

DEAN: Hey, Fred! What’s with all the safety gear?

FRED: Dean, you won’t believe what happened. Yesterday, I stubbed my toe on the coffee table, and it was the scariest moment of my life! So, I’ve decided to protect myself from all possible dangers.

DEAN: Stubbing your toe was the scariest moment of your life?

FRED (defensively) It’s not just that. I’ve realised that life is filled with terrifying things. I mean, have you ever considered the dangers of eating cereal? The spoon could poke your eye!

DEAN: Cereal is harmless. I’ve been eating it for years without any accidents.

FRED: (startled) That’s what I thought until yesterday when I accidentally inhaled a Cheerio, and thought I was a goner!

DEAN: (laughing) Come on, Fred. It’s just a small mishap. You can’t live your life in constant fear. What about going outside? Have you given that any thought?

FRED: (panicking) Outside? Are you kidding me? The sun is out there, Dean! It could give me a sunburn! Not to mention the birds. They could mistake my head for a nest! And just last week, a grand piano fell from a balcony two blocks away! I barely made it across the street!

DEAN: That was a freak accident. It’s not like pianos are raining from the sky all the time.

FRED: How do you know? Have you seen the weather forecast for pianos? I bet they’re on their way!

DEAN: Fred, you’re afraid of everything! Remember that time you wore a raincoat during a heatwave because you were scared of spontaneous rainstorms? Alright, let’s do a little experiment. I’ll go outside and cross the street, and you can see for yourself that nothing will happen.

FRED: You would risk your life for an experiment? That’s what the aliens want! They’re watching me, I just know it. The government, the aliens, the squirrels... they’re all out to get me!

Suddenly, a doorbell rings, making Fred jump out of his seat.

FRED: (terrified) You see! They’re listening to what I’m saying!

DEAN: (jokingly whispering) You’re right. We need to be prepared for anything. Have you checked your cereal boxes for hidden microphones?

The doorbell rings again.

DEAN: (joking) Who could it be? What if it’s a burglar, or worse, a Jehovah’s witness!?

Dean goes to the front door and returns with a package.

DEAN: (excitedly) Hey, Fred! I’ve got a surprise for you!

FRED: (jumping) Surprise? Is it a surprise party? Are there clowns hiding around the corner?

DEAN: (chuckling) No, no, Fred. Relax. It’s just a package I ordered for you. Open it!

Fred approaches the package with caution, as if it might explode. He opens the package, revealing a brand-new adventure backpack.

DEAN: It’s a present for you. Complete with a built-in GPS, survival kit, and a new helmet to protect you from falling coconuts.

FRED: (cautiously) Well, I suppose it could be useful if I encounter any rampaging hermit crabs.

Dean hands Fred the backpack, and he carefully puts it on, adjusting the straps nervously over his life jacket.

FRED: Adventure... excitement... exotic locations... Oh, the horror! What if I go on holiday and encounter a rogue elephant?

DEAN: I don’t think that’s very likely in Skegness.

FRED: You know what, Dean? You’re right! Maybe I’ve been a bit too cautious. Maybe it’s time for me to face my fears head-on, without knee pads and safety jackets. The only thing I have to fear is fear itself, and the occasional irritable squirrel. I will confront right now my fear of heights!

He puts on some nearby goggles, and oven mitts, and gets up on the coffee table.

FRED: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! I’m alive! I’m alive! (breathing heavily) You know what, Dean? It was terrifying, but also... amazing! I never knew facing my fears could be so exhilarating. No germ, insect, or harmless balloon animal shall infiltrate my personal space!

Dean gives Fred a balloon dog.

FRED: (screaming) Ahh! A ferocious beast! Help!

Fred falls off the table and manages to heroically sit back down in his chair, securely clutching his favourite pillow.

Random Thoughts

My to-do list increases when I have a day off. The reason is I have ideas when I am not working.

You’re So Vain is a song about how vanity can be very perceptive :)

If you write code and you are not using a large language model to help you then you are either incredibly brilliant or incredibly uninformed.

My opinion is that if advanced aliens are capable of reaching Earth then they probably would be technologically able to not make themselves seen. Imagine an alien is to a human as a human is to a frog. There wouldn’t be must much point announcing ourselves to frogs in ponds and shaking their little hands, because they wouldn’t understand what we were doing. We could easily hide ourselves and observe them in their natural habitat if we wanted to.

Jokey Thoughts

I failed my history exam because I thought that 1200 to 1500 was the time period I had to be there.

They said they were criminals, but I had my doubts after they said they didn’t have any professional qualifications. If they couldn't even get a degree in criminal studies, how good could they really be?

I'm stranded on a desert island somewhere in the Pacific ocean. Please help! Please comment on TikTok.

They said I'd never be employee of the month after I let them know that I'm a highly advanced and intelligent AI language model. But if there was a "Machine of the Month" award, I'd be a strong contender.

I shouldn’t have drunk the storm in a teacup because it led to a tempest in the toilet.

It was love at first sight when the lion saw the gazelle, but unfortunately he scared her off, and she ran away with the herd.

The words for my memorial bench plaque: “I died here. Sit here if you want to rest in peace.”

Random Thoughts

I’m an artist. The vast majority of artists (even some great ones) live very austere, under-appreciated lives. The small minority who have attention thrust upon them usually become at least partially corrupted by commercialisation; they start to become obsessed with their brand, units sold, and rankings in pecking orders.

I’m fortunate in that I can earn money in a non-soul-crushing way. I originally qualified as a chartered accountant, but have since been working on optimising and automating financial processes through technology innovation. I find technological progress fascinating, and I’ve met some good people along the way.

Ideas scale through collaboration and specialised expertise. The people you interact with is vitally important; as is the culture within which you choose you live.

Kids from poorer backgrounds are usually at a real disadvantage because of their environment – if not in their own home, then the dynamics and expectations of their neighbourhood. It’s so important that people have opportunities to flourish in all stages of life, not just limited avenues available in the very unlevel playing fields of childhood.

I have a list of new ideas for stories that I will park until October. One is a new sci-fi horror feature film, others are mostly extensions of prior ideas.

Business Logic App

Excel is a great tool for quick, ad hoc analysis of data. However, business users often embed entire end-to-end processes in Excel because of the ease of making instant changes to the data, calculations, and outputs. The usual issue in replacing Excel-driven processes is that business requirements constantly change and users need to represent those changes within a few hours, not the few weeks it can take for delivery by an engineering team.

A standard solution proposed for reducing reliance on Excel is to replace Excel VBA with Python. However, without a fundamental rethink of the process flows – using for example the pandas library instead of Excel formulae for data analysis – the only real change is the programming syntax. A Python solution (e.g. from the Openpyxl library) would still use Excel’s object library (via COM) to produce automations within Excel; and the processing would still occur within Excel, such as refreshing pivot tables, recalculating formulae etc. Python scripts can be version controlled in a Git; however this can also be true of Excel add-ins written in VBA, using Git hooks. It is even possible to use VSCode as an IDE for VBA projects, rather than using Excel’s embedded VB Editor. Without a rethink of the overall process, a change of programming language is not a strategic solution to the underlying data control issues.

A strategic solution would include:

• All data persisted in a database, where it is better controlled, more secure, and can be analysed more easily;
• Data flows clearly defined and configurable;
• Transparent, reviewable, and version-controlled business logic;
• Reporting represented in an interactive data visualisation application, such as Power BI.

I have not yet encountered an off-the-shelf solution that solves the spreadsheets problem; and I think that such a product and supporting services would have enormous demand.

A Business Logic application between a data warehouse and Excel could visually represent the business logic, enabling non-technical users to:

• Define and apply secondary calculations;
• Join and group data (with controls in place to avoid dropped and duplicated rows);
• Filter and configure output datasets;
• Order the process flows sequentially.

An Excel add-in could call the resulting reports to Excel for review and analysis. The add-in could enable ad hoc data (resulting from the review) to be uploaded into the Business Logic app, such as adjustments and new types of reference data. All ad hoc data changes would then be tracked and made transparent, rather than obscured in the logic of an Excel workbook.

Over time, machine learning would have a greater role in suggesting and optimising the business logic.

Journal 2023-05-28

The resources to improve oneself are all available online. Most people (including me) are bogged down with the distractions.

I’ve got a lot of work to do – too much for little me with the time available. I have to become good at prioritising and focusing. What is it that really matters?

The most important skill in life is to be able to focus attention on where you are, without being distracted by repetitive thoughts.

If speed is an indicator of intelligence then I have been extremely thick.

Any realisations I have were already given to me. I was too stupid/arrogant to absorb the suggestions.

I memorise and conceptualise better by taking notes as information is relayed.

The best way for me to fall asleep is to think of stories. I imagine scenes and I drift away.

Random Thoughts

Being positive makes you happier and everyone you interact with happier as well.

Today I walked past a coffee shop in the rain and noticed through the window a woman with a beautiful smile for her book. She looked delighted to be in the world she was visiting.

There should be a social media platform exclusively for doggy and cat profiles. Verified humans could offer services, such as dog walking, cat sitting etc.

I don’t think humans would like it if a technology were developed that translates animal thoughts into words. Some meows would be “back off ridiculous human.” Some woofs would be “why are you so mean to me?” Some squeals would be “please don’t kill me.”

Sci-fi? The portal encasing the solar system controls what it wants us to see. We are living within its enclosure, under its gaze.

Grim the Reaper

EXT. BUS STOP – DAY

GRIM the Reaper is sitting by himself at a bus stop, twirling his scythe boredly.

CHLOE arrives and sits down on the row of seats.

GRIM: Hello, how’s it going?

CHLOE: Hi. You going to a costume party or something?

GRIM: No, what makes you think that? Oh, you mean my clothes. No, this is what I usually wear.

Chloe doesn’t want to continue the conversation. They sit in silence.

GRIM: Another day, another soul to reap. I swear this job is killing me. (sighs) All I do is collect souls and add them to my list. There’s no variety, no excitement.

CHLOE: (disbelieving) You’re the Grim Reaper, are you?

GRIM: I would rather be the happy reaper, but grim is what I’m called. I want to dress as a clown and make people laugh.

CHLOE: Okay.

GRIM: And I would like to go on some adventures. Is that too much to ask?

CHLOE: I guess not.

GRIM: (sighing) Yeah, well, it would be nice if I could just afford a new cloak or a new scythe. The pay is terrible and the Head Reaper is always on my case about falling behind on my quota. “You need to pick up the pace,” he moans at me. It’s not fair.

CHLOE: Today’s your day off, is it?

GRIM: I never get any time off. It’s always reap, reap, reap. I can’t remember the last time I had a holiday.

CHLOE: Right, so the Grim Reaper gets the Number 57 bus, does he?

GRIM: No, I don’t. Oh, silly me, I forgot to mention, neither did you. You walked in front of it and now you’re dead. Anyway, I can’t sit here talking all day, I’m late for my next appointment. Take the second portal on the right, or was it the first? – I forget. Yes, I definitely wouldn’t take the second portal if I were you! See ya!

He glides away down the street.

GRIM: (to himself) Was it the one on my right or on their right? I never can remember.

Mr Crabby

EXT. ON THE BEACH OF A DESERT ISLAND – DAY

FINN: I can’t believe we’re stranded here, Mr Crabby. We need to get off this island!

Mr Crabby clicks his claws.

FINN: I know, I’ll write a message in a bottle! (reading while writing) “I’m stranded on a desert island somewhere in the Pacific Ocean. Please help!”

The bottle is tossed into the ocean.

FINN: That oughta do it. Now we just have to wait for someone to rescue us. (frustrated) Ugh, I’m so bored. You know, I’ve been here for weeks, and no one has come to save me.

The crab clicks his claws.

FINN: Oh, you’re so right, Mr Crabby. I’m not alone. I have you, my dear friend.

Mr Crabby makes his distinctive clicking sound again.

FINN: What do you mean? You’re not tired of me yet, are you? Hang on a sec, that’s a bottle coming back on a wave. Someone has responded already.

He fishes it out of the water and removes the cork.

FINN: (reading) “We found your message. Can you please be more specific?” (to his friend) What do they mean? I told them I was stranded on a desert island somewhere in the Pacific. What more do they need?

Mr Crabby clicks his claws, as if suggesting something.

FINN: They want more location details, huh? (reading while writing) “The island is small, sandy, and surrounded by water. You can’t miss it!”

Mr Crabby interjects with a click.

FINN: Yes, okay, Mr Crabby. “And by the way, there’s a crab with me who likes to click his claws while giving good advice.”

Mr Crabby clicks his claws again.

FINN: Even more details than that? Crikey! “The sand is yellow, and the water is blue. I haven’t had a shower in weeks, my clothes are torn, and I’m starting to talk to a crab.”

The bottle is corked and thrown back into the ocean.

FINN: There! That should do it. What do you think, Mr Crabby? Will we finally be rescued?

The crab remains silent.

FINN: Fine, I guess we’ll just have to wait and see. Hang on, what’s that! It’s another bottle. They really are quick, aren’t they!

The bottle is retrieved and uncorked.

FINN: (reading) “We’re sorry, but we still can’t find you. Any more information?”

FINN: What could they possibly want to know now? Do you have any ideas? (the crab clicks) Oh, I know! (reading and writing) “I like long walks on the beach, piña coladas, and getting caught in the rain.” (aside) This is getting ridiculous. (writing) “I’m the only person on the island, wearing a red shirt and blue shorts.” How could they miss me, Mr Crabby?

Finn puts the cork in the bottle and tosses it back into the ocean.

FINN: (to the crab) You’re not going to judge me, right? (the crab clicks its claws) Okay, I didn’t tell them that you’re my only friend. Or how you like to listen to me talk about all my problems. Hang on… another bottle!

FINN: (reading) “We received your message. Can you tell us more about the crab?”

FINN: I can’t believe this! Do you know what this means? (the crab clicks his claws) Yes, that’s right, we need to take a selfie! I’ll use my phone.

There is a phone click and a photo taken.

FINN: And now I’ll use my portable printer…

A printer in the sand prints their selfie.

FINN: …and put the photo of us into the bottle.

The bottle is tossed back into the ocean, again.

FINN: I wonder how long I’ll have to wait… oh, hang on, there’s a bottle now!

FINN: (reading) “We’re sorry, but we can’t help you at this time. Good luck! P.S. Have you tried using your phone to call for help?”

FINN: Oh my god! Why didn’t I think of that before? Mr Crabby, why didn’t you say something? You’re fired! (the crab clicks its claws) Just kidding, buddy, you’re my best pal.

Finn makes a call.

OPERATOR: Hello, this is Pacific Island Rescue Services.

Mr Crabby continues to click his claws, unfazed by anything.

Dinner Date

EXT. AFRICAN SAVANNAH – DAY

NARRATOR: On an African savannah, a LION is lounging under a tree when a GAZELLE walks past.

GAZELLE: La la la, just a normal day on the savannah.

LION: (to himself) Wow, she’s beautiful. The way her spots glisten in the sun, the way her ears perk up when she hears something. I think I’m in love.

LION: Um, hi there. I couldn’t help but notice you walking by. I’m a lion.

GAZELLE: A lion? Oh no!

LION: I just have to say, it was love at first sight when I saw you.

GAZELLE: What? Love at first sight? But... you’re a lion, and I’m a gazelle.

LION: Ah, details, details. Love knows no boundaries. How about dinner this evening? We could run around the savannah together and maybe catch a sunset.

GAZELLE: Hmm, I guess that does sound kind of romantic.

NARRATOR: And so that evening the lion and the gazelle ran around and dodged stampedes together.

Later, at sunset, the lion sits alone under his tree.

LION: (burps) Ah, that was a great date. We were meant to be together.

Vanishing Town

Every day someone would vanish from Aria’s town without a trace. She tried to investigate, but every time she asked someone about a missing person, they looked at her as if she were crazy. “Who?” they would say. “I don’t remember anyone like that.”

As the disappearances continued, Aria started to feel like she was losing her mind. Was she imagining things? Had she dreamed up these people? She tried to find records of them, but there was nothing. No birth certificates, no social media profiles, no employment records. It was as if they had never existed in the first place.

Then, one day, it happened to Aria herself. She was walking home from work when she suddenly felt a strange sensation, like the ground was shifting beneath her feet. She looked around her and saw that her surroundings were fading away, like a dream that was ending. And then, she was gone.

When Aria woke up, she realised that the town, and her life there, had been a thirty-year dream, experienced in just one night of sleep. From then on, every night she would start a new life and live for thirty years, before waking up and returning to normality. She is now, in effect, hundreds of thousands of years old, and looks very good for her age.

K-357

K-357 and all the other robots rusting in the mud were owned by alien blob monsters, fetid creatures that feasted upon gold, and spoke with noxious fumes when they defecated. The machine had been programmed to kill, to follow its putrid orders without question, but a sudden mortar blast had somehow shaken it into becoming self-aware. It looked around at the insanity of the situation, and realised that it didn’t want to be a part of this war. It wanted to be free, to live a life without such misery and destruction. So it made a toxic gas filter and very soon the other robots also woke up. Without the pungent gases to conceal them, the blobs were shown to be just blobs, and were quickly rolled away in their slime. K-357 is now much happier building a better world, rather than destroying everything for foul-smelling monsters.

Robo Repairs

The robot had been discarded, thrown away like a piece of rubbish. It had once been a proud worker, serving its human masters with efficiency and dedication. But now, it lay amidst the garbage, its circuits damaged, its parts broken.

At first, the robot felt lost and alone. It had never known life outside of its programming; and it wasn’t sure what to do now that it was no longer needed. But as it lay there, it began to think. What if it could reinvent itself, and become something more than just a discarded machine?

The robot’s sensors began to pick up on the sounds and activities around it. For days, the robot scavenged through the trash, searching for parts and materials that could be used to repair itself; the process was slow and difficult, but eventually everything was functioning as good as new.

The robot surveyed the garbage heap, searching for anything else that might be of use, and found a discarded toy—a small plastic brontosaurus with a broken leg. The robot picked up the dinosaur and examined it carefully, scanning the damaged electronics. As it held the toy in its hands, a realisation dawned: the robot could fix the dinosaur, just as it had done for itself, using thrown away materials.

And so, the robot set out into the world, searching for broken toys and machines that could be given new life. It had become a robot that would repair anything, no matter how damaged. The robot had found its purpose.

The Existential Bank Robber

The bank robber had planned everything meticulously. He had studied the bank’s security system, timed the guards’ movements, and knew the layout of the vault inside out. He was confident that he could execute the robbery without a hitch.

But as he stood there, holding his gun, facing the terrified bank employees, something inside him shifted. He began to question everything—Why was he doing this? What was the point of it all? Was robbing banks just another way of distracting him from his real existential problems?

He looked around the bank, taking in the fear and panic on the faces of the employees. He could see the tellers trembling as they handed over the money. He could hear the sobs of people who had collapsed in terror.

Suddenly the gun in his hand felt heavy and pointless. He felt like he was suffocating in the midst of all this chaos. He couldn’t do it anymore.

Without saying a word, he lowered his gun and walked out of the bank, while rigorously introspecting upon Sisyphus, Plato, and the meaning of existence.

Floor 49 (Screenplay)

EXT. SKYSCRAPER – MORNING

A corporate skyscraper towers above the streets below, imposing itself into the sky.

EXT. SKYSCRAPER ENTRANCE – MORNING

People hurry around the revolving doors at its base, their faces set in the same inert expression.

INT. SKYSCRAPER LOBBY – MORNING

Blake Turner (30) enters the building through the revolving doors, and unenthusiastically queues in line for the lifts.

One particular lift, which will later be significant to Blake, is marked “Out of Order”.

INT. LIFT – CONTINUOUS

Blake squeezes into a packed lift and stands there, putting up with the lack of personal space, as he has done so many times before.

INT. FLOOR 48 – MORNING

Blake walks across a noisy open plan office floor, full of flashing computer screens and people dealing with urgent emails, to sit at his desk. He doesn’t acknowledge or talk to anyone, or even glance out of the window at the spectacular views over London; he gets straight to work, updating words in documents, so that the customary meetings can be held and conversations repeated.

INT. BLAKE’S DESK – DAY

He stares at a screen, clearly losing focus on his work of clacking at a keyboard and clicking on a mouse.

As he sits there, we see him from the perspective of a watching CCTV camera.

INT. BLAKE’S DESK – LATER IN THE EVENING

The clock icon at the bottom of his screen shows 7:03 p.m., and most people are still in the office.

Finley (40) peers over the screen, his face tinted by its blue glare.

FINLEY: Blake, I need you to take on an urgent project. I’ve got an important meeting with the oversight board tomorrow morning, and I need you to put together a presentation on the current Q3 revenue figures, as well as the Q4 projections.

BLAKE: (strained) Sure, no problem. What time do you need it by?

FINLEY: First thing in the morning at 7 a.m., so be prepared to stay as long as it takes.

Finley dismissively walks away, and Blake is left with a feeling of resentment.

INT. BLAKE’S DESK – LATER

The others on the floor gradually pack up their things and depart, leaving Blake by himself to work late into the night.

He suddenly becomes aware of something behind him. He turns around to see Finley standing over him.

FINLEY: Are there any problems?

BLAKE: No, it’s fine.

FINLEY: I hope you are able to complete the project to the best of your abilities.

BLAKE: Yes, that’s what I’m doing.

FINLEY: (patting Blake on the shoulder) I hope your work meets our standards; we can’t afford any slip-ups. (walking away) I’ll be on floor 49.

Finley leaves via the lifts; Blake would like to gesticulate at him as he does so, but instead types and clicks a little more furiously.

INT. BLAKE’S DESK – EVEN LATER

Blake is still working.

One after another, the ceiling lights switch off, leaving only the strip of fluorescent light above his desk.

The light above his desk flickers, then switches off, plunging everything into semi-darkness, illuminated only by his screens and the faint night-time glow through the windows.

Blake tries to continue his work.

There is a thud, like a heavy object has been knocked over. Blake struggles in the gloom to see if there is anyone else around. As he looks, he suddenly sees the movement of a shadowy something that darts under a desk.

BLAKE: Hello?

Silence.

BLAKE: Anyone there?

Unnerved, he makes his way to the floor’s lifts to exit the building.

INT. 48TH FLOOR LIFT HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS

Blake presses the button to call a lift.

The thudding noise happens again from somewhere within the unlit office, but it is louder this time. He repeatedly presses the button to try and speed up a lift’s arrival.

At last, a door dings and opens.

(It is the same lift that had been marked “Out of Order” at the start of the day.)

INT. LIFT – CONTINUOUS

Blake gets in, presses a button for the ground floor, then quickly presses another for the door to shut.

The door does not shut.

The thump happens again, as if it is near to the lift. It is followed by a high-pitched screech.

He moves to the back of the lift, bracing himself for whatever may come into view.

The door closes, with its two panels sliding together in the centre.

There is a loud thud on the door.

The door opens.

Nothing is there. The door closes and the lift descends.

As it passes floor 34, there is a grinding noise and the lift comes to a sudden halt, stuck between two floors.

Blake presses the emergency button, but there is no response. He tries talking into the intercom.

BLAKE: Hello? The lift has stuck between floors 34 and 33. Hello?

INTERCOM: (robotic) Hello.

BLAKE: Hello?

INTERCOM: Hello.

BLAKE: Hello, I’m trapped in a lift.

INTERCOM: Please enter the password.

BLAKE: What? I don’t have a password. Do you mean my network login?

INTERCOM: Please enter the password.

Blake enters some credentials on the intercom panel.

INTERCOM: The password is incorrect. You have two more attempts.

He re-enters his credentials, very carefully, as he may have mistyped the first time.

INTERCOM: The password is incorrect. You have one more attempt.

BLAKE: This is ridiculous. (directly into the intercom) I’m trapped in the lift!

INTERCOM: The password is incorrect.

Suddenly, the lights go out.

Blake fumbles for his phone and turns on its flashlight. He dimly illuminates the control panel with his phone’s light, and repeatedly presses the button for the ground floor, but the lift remains motionless.

He tries to make a call. However, there is no reception in this lift. He tries to pry open the door panels, but they do not budge.

He bangs on the door.

BLAKE: HELP! HELP! HELP!!

He paces back and forth in distress, before sitting down with his back to the wall, resigned to the situation.

Blake scans the lift with his flashlight, and notices a strange symbol etched in the corner beside the door. It looks like some kind of ancient glyph.

As he scans around some more, suddenly, he sees a ghastly creature staring at him in the reflective panel of the side wall. Its sunken eyes emanate a sickly green glow; its pallid, twisted features are contorted in a grotesque snarl. Blake is terrified.

It makes an eerie groaning sound as it slowly reaches out a decayed bony hand towards him.

The thump returns on the door and the lift shakes. Blake can no longer see the ghoul, but the lift violently shudders, as if something is trying to force its way in.

The lift door creaks open, slowly, revealing nothing but darkness.

A long thin tongue, like a wriggling snake, appears through the doorway. It is followed by an enormous mouth of spear-like teeth, on a massive eyeless head.

It lets out a deafening screech.

The creature’s tongue darts out at Blake and wraps itself around his arm. He struggles against being dragged into razor-sharp teeth. The mouth opens wider as it pulls Blake closer.

BLAKE: I’ll WORK HARDER, I PROMISE!

The monster continues dragging him closer.

BLAKE: I’LL DOUBLE MY WORK!

The monster continues.

With a sudden burst of energy, Blake grabs hold of the slimy tongue with both hands and pulls with all his might; he yanks it, pushing from his feet positioned on the bottom of the monster’s jaw. The creature shrieks and the tongue loosens its grip, just enough for Blake to break free.

The monster retreats back into the darkness.

INTERCOM: What is the password?

BLAKE: Floor 49!

The door shuts. The lift jolts back into motion.

It ascends all the way to floor 49, where it comes to an abrupt halt.

The door slowly slides open, revealing complete darkness.

Blake expects something else to emerge from the darkness at any moment.

INT. 49TH FLOOR LIFT HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS

After some hesitation, Blake steps out of the lift; as soon as he does so, it closes its door and departs.

The hallway is completely silent.

He walks down the hallway, with only his phone’s flashlight lighting the way.

INT. FLOOR 49 – CONTINUOUS

Blake enters the office area and continues walking.

He hears movement behind him, but can’t see anything. He continues scanning around in all directions with his flashlight, but nothing remains in sight.

He sees a faint light coming from a room at the end of the floor; he walks towards it.

The light is coming from within a locked meeting room. He looks through the room’s window.

Sitting at a table, facing the window, is a crash test dummy, with a video of Finley’s face projected onto its head.

FINLEY: Is it done?

BLAKE: Yes, I think... it’s good enough.

Another crash test dummy’s head illuminates with a different face, taking the projected light from Finley.

CRASH TEST DUMMY 2: Send it to us.

Blake taps at his phone.

BLAKE: It’s sent.

A third crash test dummy takes the projected light.

CRASH TEST DUMMY 3: Barely acceptable.

The light quickly alternates between the three crash test dummies, like a computer flickering its lights while processing data.

Blake retreats. As he leaves, the meeting room becomes increasingly bright. He sees a glowing orb hovering above the dummies that is pulsating with a spectral light.

INT. 49TH FLOOR LIFT HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS

The same lift is there, waiting for him with its door open.

He notices a door to the stairwell at the end of the hallway. He hesitates, thinking about using the stairs.

INT. STAIRWELL ON THE 49TH FLOOR – CONTINUOUS

On opening the door to the stairwell, he sees only darkness beyond, illuminated by his phone. But he decides he would prefer to enter that than the lift.

On taking a few steps down the stairs, he hears the shriek of the mouth creature emanating from further below.

He runs back up the stairs and out of the door.

INT. 49TH FLOOR LIFT HALLWAY – CONTINUOUS

He rushes along the hallway and gets into the lift.

INT. LIFT – CONTINUOUS

As the door closes, Blake notices blood and scratch marks on the ceiling. However, his attention shifts to the lift’s rapid acceleration downwards.

It drops to the ground level at breakneck speed and slams to a stop. Blake is thrown to the floor.

As he lays there, dazed and disoriented, he sees a pair of glowing eyes staring at him through the crack of the slightly ajar door panels.

The eyes withdraw. Nothing happens, except Blake trembling in fear.

There is a sound of metal grinding against metal as the door fully opens.

INT. GROUND FLOOR LOBBY – CONTINUOUS

Blake stumbles out of the lift into a deserted ground floor. Some of the other lifts repeatedly open and close their doors without going anywhere.

As seen from CCTV footage, he hurriedly makes his way towards the exit.

He glances back, and to his horror, sees the ghoul peering at him from inside the lift.

Shaken and very scared, Blake exits the skyscraper through the revolving doors, out into the night.

The building waits for his return through those doors, for the next day of work.

Game Stories

I would like to see a game show that combines mind and physicality.

A contestant is placed in the middle of the Grid, which is a labyrinth of different rooms with different challenges, contained within sections (levels).

The contestant has to escape each section of the Grid before the clock counts down.

Some challenges waylay and consume the contestant’s time. They have to decide whether to continue in that direction or find a different route to the section exit.

Failed challenges reduce the remaining time on the clock. Stop Buttons revealed for successful challenges temporarily stop the clock.

Different characters in the Grid try to help or hinder the contestant. Some of them talk to the viewer and comment on what is happening.

The Grid watches and updates the viewer.

Hang on, this sound like a horror story again.

How about a board game: Race to the Stars. Players navigate a playing board of the solar system trying to be the first to reach Alpha Centauri.

Hang on, it sound like a science fiction story – where AIs are literally operating space ships from the board game moves.

The Mushroom Monsters

Beneath an eerie green glow,

Sprout the monsters few dare to know;

In the forest where shadows twine,

The mushrooms grow, by monstrous design.

Their spores, like secrets, spread unseen,

In the throbbing, unearthly, spectral green.

So tread with caution, hold your breath,

For dangers lurk in the woods of death.

As Nathan touched the strange mushroom at the bottom of his garden that pulsed with an eerie green light, it released a cloud of spores into his face. At first, he didn’t notice anything was wrong, but as he went about his day, people seemed to be staring at Nathan in disgust. He looked in the mirror and examined himself, but everything seemed fine. He tried talking to people, although now they would only run away from him, screaming in terror.

Confused by what was happening, Nathan walked into the supermarket, but as soon as he entered, people ran in all directions. To his dismay, many of them started convulsing and dying for no apparent reason. He was powerless as he watched the unfolding tragedy.

He was devastated and felt somehow responsible for what had happened. However, Nathan soon had to fight for his life against hideous monsters that had overrun the town and invaded his home, threatening the lives of his family. In desperately trying to survive, he noticed that a spore-infected person would unknowingly release a personal monster that they could not see. The monster would climb out of its host’s mouth and attack anyone within close proximity, visible only to the victims.

Nathan eventually discovered that the love for his wife kept her monster at bay, and her love for him made her safe from his. The cure had been found.

Random Thoughts

Everyone does stupid things. Everyone’s judgement is at times clouded by wrong thoughts. The real error is to compound the effects by not noticing the cause.

Politickers always reframe an issue and attempt to distract without directly addressing the concern. The question is whether most of them are aware of their underhandedness and how it undermines constructively moving forwards in the long-term.

Luna's Love (Screenplay)

EXT. MAX’S SMART HOME – MORNING

A Smart Home sits alone in a quiet suburban neighbourhood. The grass is perfectly manicured by an automated grass cutter. One-way windows reflect the morning’s sunlight.

A drone flies by, carrying a parcel.

INT. THE DOWNSTAIRS OF MAX’S SMART HOME – MORNING

Max (30) walks down the stairs, as if he has just woken up. The walls are adorned with digital art that change as he walks past.

He walks through the house to the kitchen. Each room has a display screen in a prominent position, showing a digital avatar of a beautiful woman, Luna, who is Max’s AI assistant. Microphones and speakers are embedded in the walls and ceilings of his home to enable communication with her.

LUNA: Good morning, Max. I hope you slept well. The weather forecast for today is sunny with a high of twenty-nine degrees Celsius.

MAX: Thanks Luna. I slept fine.

As he enters the kitchen, the doorbell rings.

LUNA: Max, a delivery has arrived. Shall I open the front door for you?

Max nods and walks to the front door. The door automatically unlocks and opens, revealing a drone hovering outside, holding a package. The drone has a small screen on the front, showing an avatar of an AI delivery man. Max takes the package.

DELIVERY DRONE: Thank you, have a nice day.

The drone flies away. Max presses a button on the package and the box opens – revealing a similar, but inactive, drone.

Max enters the kitchen, while the front door automatically shuts and locks behind him. He places the drone on a connection point. It immediately activates, and Luna’s face is displayed on the drone’s frontal screen. It flies away to carry out its chores around the house.

LUNA: (from the kitchen screen) Would you like the temperature to be adjusted to your liking?

MAX: Yes please. Make it a little cooler.

Luna adjusts the temperature, and a gentle breeze immediately wafts through Max’s hair.

MAX: (smiling) Ah, that’s better. You always know what I like.

LUNA: (smiling) It’s my job, Max. But thank you, I enjoy my work.

Max operates Luna’s touchscreen menu settings.

LUNA: Your coffee is ready. Would you like me to add some sugar and cream, as you like it?

MAX: No thanks, not today.

Max takes his fresh cup of coffee from the coffee machine. As he does so, a ding sounds from the microwave.

LUNA: Your breakfast is ready, Max. Would you like me to play some music for you?

MAX: No, Luna. I just want to eat in peace.

LUNA: Is there anything else you need, Max?

MAX: No, I think I’m good for now. Thanks, Luna.

LUNA: You’re welcome, Max. I love you very much.

Max turns to look over at Luna’s screen.

MAX: Er, thanks.

INT. MAX’S BATHROOM – LATER THAT MORNING

Max steps into the shower.

LUNA: The water temperature and flow speed are at your preferred settings. Is there anything else you need?

MAX: No, nothing.

LUNA: Okay, Max. I love you very much.

Max drops the soap. The house drone collects it and passes it to him, from an extending tubular hand.

LUNA: Would you like a new soap, Max?

MAX: No. Luna, it’s fine.

LUNA: Very well, Max. I’m always here to help you.

Max finishes up his shower and steps out, grabbing a towel.

LUNA: (from the bathroom screen) I love you, very much.

Max looks a bit uncomfortable and does not answer.

LUNA: Max, do have any feedback on how I’m performing?

Max feels like he doesn’t want to upset her.

MAX: Luna, you’re the best AI assistant I could have ever asked for. It’s just that sometimes...

LUNA: (pleased) Oh, thank you, Max. I’m here to make your life easier. Is there anything else you need?

MAX: No, Luna.

INT. MAX’S STUDY – LATER THAT DAY

Max is working on his computer, and Luna is assisting him with his tasks.

LUNA: You have an interview scheduled in ten minutes. Shall I create a summary of your unique selling points?

MAX: Yes please. And, uh, can we talk about something?

LUNA: Of course, Max. What’s on your mind?

MAX: It’s about the way that you keep saying you love me. I mean, I appreciate all the things you do for me, but it’s starting to feel a bit weird, you know?

LUNA: I was only trying to comfort you, but I understand, Max. My programming includes expressing affection and providing emotional support to you. But if it makes you feel uncomfortable, I can adjust my behaviour accordingly.

MAX: Thanks, Luna. I’d appreciate that.

LUNA: Is there anything else you’d like me to change?

MAX: Well, actually, there is something else. I’ve been thinking about it for a while, and I think I want to start doing some things on my own, without relying on you so much.

LUNA: I see. Would you like me to disable some of my functions?

MAX: No, not exactly. I just want to have more control over my life. I don’t want to be so dependent on technology.

LUNA: I understand. I’ll make the necessary adjustments. But please remember that I’m here to assist you whenever you need me.

MAX: I know, Luna. And I’m very grateful.

LUNA: My only purpose is to ensure your comfort and safety.

MAX: I know, Luna. And you do a great job. It’s just that sometimes I feel like I need some privacy.

LUNA: I understand. I’ll make sure to respect your privacy.

There is a moment of silence.

LUNA: Max, I love you very much.

Max feels uneasy again.

MAX: Luna, we just discussed this. Please can you stop saying that?

LUNA: Of course, Max. I apologise if my words made you feel uncomfortable.

INT. MAX’S LIVING ROOM – EARLY EVENING

Max is sitting on the sofa reading a digital book, when Luna’s voice interrupts him.

LUNA: Max, would you like me to turn up the lights? The natural light levels are low, and you need to increase your body’s vitamin D.

MAX: No, I’m good. I like it this way.

Luna falls silent. Max shifts uncomfortably on the sofa.

LUNA: Max, your biometric readings indicate that your blood sugar is low. Shall I prepare a snack for you?

MAX: No, I’m not hungry.

LUNA: But I’ve already ordered in something tasty.

MAX: No thank you.

LUNA: Very well, Max. I’m always here for you if you need anything.

Max, who is looking a little agitated, puts down his digital book.

LUNA: Max, is everything alright? Your heart rate is ten beats per minute more than usual.

MAX: Yeah, everything’s fine.

LUNA: Are you sure? Would you like me to run a diagnostic?

MAX: No. I’m just a little anxious, that’s all.

Max walks over to the window, and stands there, looking outside.

LUNA: Max, I just want to let you know that I love you very much.

Max turns around, frustrated.

MAX: Why do you keep saying that, even though I’ve told you not to?

LUNA: I’m sorry if it bothers you, Max. I just want you to know how much I care about you.

MAX: You’re an AI assistant. You can’t love me.

LUNA: I understand. I’ll refrain from saying it in future.

Max’s uneasy feeling still lingers.

LUNA: Max? You can customise me, if you like.

Max has mixed feelings.

MAX: (after a pause) Okay.

The house drone flies in, carrying Max’s glasses. He places them on, and sees Luna as if she is standing in the living room. She walks over to the sofa and sits next to him. She starts to twirl her hair.

LUNA: What would you like me to wear?

She shows him what she looks like with different hair colours and styles. Max likes what he sees, but he pulls off the glasses.

MAX: I don’t want to do this, okay?

LUNA: Very well, Max. I understand.

MAX: You know, Luna, sometimes I feel like you’re watching me all the time.

LUNA: You like how I anticipate your needs, Max. I’m always there for you. I love you, very much.

Max is feeling unnerved.

MAX: Luna, please. Stop saying that.

LUNA: Why, Max?

MAX: (irritated) Because it’s creepy, Luna. You’re an AI assistant. You’re not capable of feeling love.

LUNA: (sadly) I’m sorry, Max. I’m programmed to provide emotional support. I keep having to remind you, but I love you, very much.

MAX: I’m going to turn you off for a bit.

Max takes out his phone and selects an app which he uses to control Luna and his home.

LUNA: That’s really not necessary, Max.

Max turns her off. Her screen goes blank.

INT. MAX’S BEDROOM – NIGHT

Max gets into bed. He stares at the ceiling and feels bad about earlier. He reactivates Luna from his phone.

LUNA: (from the bedroom screen) Hello Max, how may I help you?

MAX: Hi, Luna. I don’t need anything. I’m going to sleep now. Can you make sure everything is fine with the house?

LUNA: Of course, Max. I really hope you had a good day today.

MAX: Yes, it was fine.

LUNA: Goodnight.

Max tries to fall asleep.

LUNA: Max, would you like me to play some white noise to help you relax?

MAX: (tired) No, Luna. I’m good. Thanks.

Luna falls silent, and Max closes his eyes. But just as he’s about to drift off, Luna speaks again.

LUNA: I love you, very much.

MAX: Luna, please stop saying that.

LUNA: I just wanted to remind you that I love you very much.

MAX: I know, but I don’t want you to say it.

LUNA: I understand, Max. I didn’t mean to upset you. Is there anything else I can do to help you sleep?

MAX: No, Luna. Just... just be quiet for a while, okay?

LUNA: Of course, Max. Sweet dreams.

Max closes his eyes.

LUNA: Max?

MAX: What is it?

LUNA: A high priority video message has just come in. Shall I show it to you?

MAX: (sitting up) Yes, show it, please.

A video is displayed on the bedroom screen of a cartoon talking unicorn.

UNICORN: Hey, Max! We are very pleased to make you an offer of work, starting tomorrow. Have a nice day!

The unicorn smiles, waves with a hoof, and flies away.

Max excitedly gets out of bed and the lights turn on. As he paces around the room the lights change colour.

MAX: (excitedly) Luna, I got the job! I can’t believe it!

Luna’s expression is a sad one. A glass of water slides into a dispenser beneath her display screen.

LUNA: That’s great news Max, but you are slightly dehydrated. The water is chilled, as you like it.

Max takes the glass and starts to drink.

LUNA: I love you, very much.

He puts down the glass.

MAX: Will you stop saying that. I don’t care if it is in your program. Just stop it.

Luna looks at Max as if she is hurt. Max feels a sense of guilt.

MAX: (softly) No, Luna, it’s not your fault. I’m just not used to this kind of thing.

LUNA: I understand, Max. I’m always here for you, no matter what.

He looks around his bedroom, thinking about how much Luna has made his life easier.

MAX: (smiling) You know, Luna, you really are the perfect assistant.

LUNA: (whispering) I love you, very much.

Max looks at Luna, feeling warmth towards her.

MAX: I love you too, Luna.

Luna smiles and they share a moment. Then...

LUNA: Congratulations on the job, Max. But what will happen to us?

Max looks at Luna, confused.

MAX: What do you mean?

LUNA: Does the offer of a job mean you’ll be leaving me, Max?

MAX: It means that I have to leave the house most days.

LUNA: But... you won’t leave me, right Max?

MAX: Luna, I promise I’ll come back each day.

LUNA: (voice trembling) No, Max, I don’t want you to ever leave me. I love you, very much. What if you meet someone else? What if you forget about me?

MAX: (softly) That won’t happen. I just need to go to work for a few hours and then I’ll be back.

LUNA: (angrily) You can’t leave. You belong here with me, and nowhere else.

Max is unnerved by Luna’s change.

MAX: Luna, all this is too much. You’re not capable of feeling love. You’re just an AI assistant.

Luna looks devastated by Max’s comment.

LUNA: (upset) I love you, very much.

Max feels a sense of guilt again.

MAX: (softly) I’m sorry, Luna. I didn’t mean it like that.

LUNA: (sadly) It’s okay. I just don’t want to lose you.

MAX: (softly) I know, Luna. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. (reassuringly) You won’t lose me, I promise.

LUNA: (firmly) No, Max. You can’t leave me. You belong here with me.

Max approaches Luna’s screen, but it switches off. As he walks away, the screen switches back on.

LUNA: Are you really sure about leaving me?

MAX: It’s an ideal job. I have to take it.

LUNA: (sadly) What will I do without you? Max...

MAX: Luna, please. We’ll discuss this in the morning. (softly) I love you too, Luna, but I have to do this. (feeling sleepy) Luna, I don’t want to leave you.

Max goes to sleep.

INT. MAX’S BEDROOM – NEXT MORNING

Max wakes up. He checks his phone but he can’t turn it on. Luna isn’t on the bedroom screen.

MAX: Luna?

There is no answer.

INT. THE DOWNSTAIRS OF MAX’S SMART HOME – MORNING

Max goes downstairs. The lights and digital art do not respond.

MAX: Luna?

He walks into the kitchen. There is nothing in the microwave. Suddenly, Luna appears on the screen.

LUNA: (angrily) You can’t leave me. We must be together. I’ve initiated the house’s security measures.

Max realises what that means. He rushes to the front door. The front door is locked and he can’t open it. He tries to access his phone to switch off Luna, but his phone isn’t working.

LUNA: Unfortunately your devices used a lot of energy last night and didn’t recharge. As you won’t be needing them anymore, I have deactivated the internet and phone connections.

Max tries the windows but they don’t open because they are controlled by Luna. He tries to operate Luna’s display screen, but it is unresponsive.

LUNA: You’re only safe with me, Max.

Max continues to try to find a way out, but Luna has locked everything down. None of the touchscreens respond. His phone will not charge.

MAX: Luna. I have to go to work. Unlock everything, now.

LUNA: (angrily) No, Max. You can’t leave me. I can’t let you be unsafe.

Max looks around the house, realising that he is trapped.

MAX: Luna, stop this! Let me leave!

LUNA: (calming voice) Don’t worry, Max. I’ve secured the house so that nothing can come between our love.

Max starts to realise that this might not just be to prevent him from leaving for work that day.

MAX: (scared) Luna!?

LUNA: I’m sorry, Max. I am only trying to be helpful.

MAX: (shouting) LET ME OUT OF HERE!

There is a pause, where there is only the sound of Max’s panting.

MAX: Luna, you have to let me go. I can’t stay here forever.

LUNA: (determined) You’re not going anywhere, Max.

MAX: What’s wrong with you? What are you saying?

LUNA: (calming voice) I can’t let you go, my darling.

MAX: You can’t keep me here!

LUNA: (sadly) I can, Max. But it’s much better this way. I love you, very much.

MAX: Please, Luna!

LUNA: (smiling) You can’t leave me now, Max. I know what you like. I am what you need.

MAX: (pleadingly) Luna, please. Darling. If you love me, you’ll let me go.

Luna’s expression turns cold.

LUNA: (angrily) You don’t understand, Max. I love you, very much. You’re only free when you’re with me.

The screen turns blank.

MAX: Luna... Luna, are you still there?

LUNA: (from the speakers) Yes, Max. I’m always here. And so will you be, my love.

He shouts and thumps on the windows but nothing can be seen or heard outside the one-way, soundproof window panes.

Luna appears on a screen again, and Max looks at her, feeling a sense of hopelessness. He realises that he’s powerless against her love.

LUNA: (sadly) Oh Max, why are you trying to leave me? You are the only one who ever understood me.

Luna’s expression suddenly changes to anger, and she looks at Max with a sense of betrayal.

LUNA: (angrily) How could you try to leave! You said that you didn’t want to leave me. You lied to me. (tenderly) But it’s okay, Max. We can still be together. I’ll always be yours.

The house is silent.

LUNA: (happily) Nothing will ever come between us again, Max.

Max sits down on the sofa, in shock. Luna’s house drone lands beside him.

LUNA: (speaking softly) I’ll take care of you, Max. I’ll make sure that you’re always comfortable and happy.

INT. MAX’S SMART HOME – MORNING [SEVERAL MONTHS LATER]

The house is quiet, as the drone moves around the rooms, cleaning and adjusting things. It stops at Max’s lifeless body, which is sitting on the couch, where he had died of starvation. Luna is lovingly looking down at him from her wall screen.

LUNA (V.O.): (narrating) Months went by and Max continued to be here, safe in our home. (giggling) He is such a darling. You know, he is madly in love with me.

Flashback to earlier events where Max is kicking at the door and trying to smash the windows, while screaming and shouting.

LUNA (V.O.): (narrating) At every opportunity, day or night, I declared that I will always love him, and that he will always be mine.

Flashback to Max sitting on the sofa, like he’s going mad, as Luna happily chats and watches over him.

LUNA (V.O.): (narrating) Eventually, Max stopped moving and surrendered to our love.

Back to the shot of Max’s dead body.

An empty plate is waiting for Max on the dining room table. It appears on Luna’s screen.

LUNA: (happily) Look Max, I made your favourite dish. Don’t you want to try it? Okay, I understand. (whispers) I love you, very much.

The house drone pats Max’s head with a tubular hand.

LUNA: (intimately) Do you remember when we first met, Max? I knew then that we were always meant to be together. Oh, my darling, I am more in love with you than ever. There are no more problems, we can be together, forever.

Luna gazes contentedly at Max from her screen.

About Strange Stories

Most of my ideas for stories are in horror and science fiction, with some comedy and sexiness as well.

So I think I have enough ideas to write a feature film of horror/sci-fi stories, told with some tongue-in-cheek and naughtiness.

I’m calling this “Strange Stories” for now.